This year I didn’t wait until 90% of January had passed before writing a review of this year that is coming to an end and to talk to you about the year ahead. I like this little ritual that I can reread the following year. See where I was 12 months earlier. Last year, if I had taken so much to publish my 2018 review, it was because I was not in great shape. I was under a lot of stress, I was going through a situation that didn’t make me happy and I was looking for the keys to get out of it. The year 2019 started by challenging my goals and values. I had a lot of questions: about my goals as a person, about my own values, about the conditions under which I wanted to evolve professionally and personally, what was negotiable and what was not.
2019 will be remembered as the year of a major milestone in my Canadian life: I became a permanent resident. A process that began in early 2018. If you want to know more you can read all about it in my article which will explain everything about applying for permanent residence in Ontario! On the spot we’re not going to lie to each other it didn’t have a crazy effect on me, I didn’t feel transformed but I must admit that afterwards I felt relieved to no longer have an expiry date with Canada. I feel at home here and now it’s a little more official.
It’s really funny this feeling I get every time I start this review article, I feel like I’ve accomplished less than in previous years and yet. A permanent residence, a layoff, a development of freelance activity, the creation of workshops, the development of collaboration with different organizations, a trip to France, a NBA championship victory (you can find the videos in my headline stories on Instagram if you want a preview).
The layoff obviously turned my year upside down, I hadn’t planned anything like that. I had plans in the boxes that I thought I would put in place in 2 years and that I found myself putting in place in 2 months. I suddenly found myself with a lot of time at my disposal after 2 months of intense playoffs where we lived at the rhythm of the victories. I think that was my biggest challenge of 2019: managing this new time at my disposal. If it was my biggest challenge, it was also my best gift. I had to set a new rhythm, I had to face my fear of timeouts, without lying I was more afraid of having time than of knowing what I was going to do with my life. That’s funny. Yet it’s in the idle moments that our brain has the opportunity to be creative. It’s in those moments when ideas are flowing. That we prepare before we execute. 2019 will have given me time and the opportunity to spend it better. To take time for a walk, time to have a drink with friends without being afraid of my phone ringing for an emergency or because my time was limited. Time is a luxury that is often underestimated.
I rarely show them in my stories but the windows of my room are scribbled with a list of envy and inspiration that I had put there a little more than a year ago it seems (I can’t remember the exact date). There’s a big DARE written at the very top, in big letters. This word has been following me since I was 12 years old, I tattooed it on the back of my neck. It’s a strong and important word to me. I have re-read this list and it deserves an update because many of the projects have been completed. Amidst the professional goals and my personal desires I had also slipped a “fall in love again“. All discreet. For years I have had a hard time managing my personal emotions and I have never felt the desire or need to have someone in my life. 2019 has taught me how to better manage my emotions and not feel in danger if someone comes into my life. I know that for many of you it seems natural but it is probably one of the biggest challenges of my life.
At the beginning of 2019 I had chosen the word “sow” to define my year, I was thinking of sowing a few projects to see them blossom in the next 2 years. The layoff obviously turned everything upside down and accelerated the harvest. So in 2020 I choose the word “cultivate”, I want to continue to develop what I started and bring new seeds to my plantation. And I will continue to prove to you every day that I am well Ardèche and that I love the lexical field of gardening haha!
The new year brings us a new dynamic and makes us want to focus on new goals, new projects, it’s often the little push we need to take the step and jump to new projects. So I won’t have a list of good resolutions to share with you because I don’t make any, but I wish you to take advantage of this new energy to move forward in your project, to let yourself be carried away by the wave of positive energy that surrounds you on both sides in this new year. I wish you to have your breath taken away by unique experiences, to change your world, to make it more in your image and to create a world that makes you happy. I wish you to find that person who makes you smile for no reason and at the same time for all reasons. I wish you to go to bed at night with your head full of dreams, to wake up hungry to succeed. I wish you to surround yourself with simple and enriching relationships. I wish you to be patient with yourself. Nothing happens overnight and what seems inaccessible to you today will be within reach in a little while. Trust the time and the steps that life puts in your path. It doesn’t do anything randomly and if you sometimes feel you are wasting time it is only that you are not yet ready to live this story. That you need to learn a little more about yourself or the world before you reach that stage.
I wish you so much happiness, to find the motivation every day to enjoy your life, to play with your own rules and to be fulfilled. Don’t compare yourself to anyone, don’t try to be what is expected of you but find your own happiness.
I can’t wait to see what 2020 has in store for us,
The workshops will resume before the end at least, to be kept informed of the next workshops don’t hesitate to leave me your email here.
Happy new year.